Love Advice To Live By from “Deborah Says”
When you think you have it all, life hits you hard. When you think you have mastered the art of a successful career and love life, universe says not yet. When Yeon Bo Ra was waiting for that final question to take the “and they live happily ever after” line in her own version of fairy tale, fairy god mother turned witch decided to throw her a horror tale instead—a nightmare that she’s definitely not expecting to face.
But, with her world flipping 360-degree, she had no choice but to go through the stages of breaking to healing. Throughout her journey, we’ve picked different versions of herself and the way she directly—or not—has dropped love advice and slapped our faces with different versions of reality we just need to face and overcome.
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Here are some of the love advice we just need to be reminded time by time according to both Bo Ra, a dating expert in Deborah Says; and Bo Ra herself, a lover drowned with pain but healed with self-appreciation and time.
Cheating is Cheating
End of discussion. Cheating that came from choice mixed with lust, craving for satisfaction and whatever reason there was—is still cheating. Can you forgive? Can you forget? People trust and forgive in so many layers that are never easy to fully see. But, cheating should never be tolerated and supported at all costs. And most importantly, the party who got cheated on should never put herself/himself down to validate the other side’s actions.
Seek for Karma and not for Revenge
Revenge seems easier to grasp and have that sort of fairness sensation, but it can be exhausting and can put you in a loop that you can hardly escape. So, pursue for Karma and your patience will surely be rewarding, fulfilling, and just a whole different feeling of “justice has been served” can run through your healed or healing heart.
Take this Quiz: Which Bo Ra! Deborah Character Are You Most Like?
When the Relationship Has Become Like a Rotting Garbage, It’s Time To Decompose Gracefully
For sure, you can be trapped as well in that smelly bin. It doesn’t mean, however, that you have to stay there and rot badly. Leave as soon as possible and put yourself on the right place and rebirth beautifully.
F*ck People’s Opinions When They Never Even Met You Once
An alcohol-poisoned Bo Ra can be vulnerably transparent and can explode a bomb that she herself can also be a victim of. Regrets can come afterwards, but it can never be as liberating as it is when you could shout out your frustrations in whatever crowd you may ever be. Let time fades those embarrassing yet brave moments.
Cry Out Loud When You Need … Wherever You Are
Pain can make you numb. And that is alright. It can be as typical as people need water to survive. But, time always comes through and sets a limit. So, when you are still in that phase of feeling frozen-like that nobody can make you move, just let the those tears fall. It would feel good, rest assured.
We have broken differently. We heal in various ways. We may be like Bo Ra at one point or not, but we all need to pick those advice, stand up, and heal in the most deserving way we can ever have.
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Fangirling: Started from Full House. Continued in Secret Garden. Though a total K-drama addict, she’s a newbie in the world of Korean and Chinese idols.
Personal: She is a lover of coffee and cheese. She’s been wandering slowly (very) for seven years, finding home in cities she fell in love with. When she can win over laziness, she will let the words flow.